Thought that Counts – Tell Me Another One

How many times in our lives have we heard that particular phrase, “It’s the thought that counts.” Be that as it may, how often do we actually appreciate the thought behind some of the things that is phrase is often applied to? Seriously, not many people actually appreciate the thought and effort that goes into doing things.

I have determined that next year, if any one gets a gift from me at all, it will be in cash. Probably no more than $10 or $15. I am not being cheap, I am poor so I really can’t afford to actually give a lot of money to people and I try to spend no more than $10-$15 on presents per person, with some exceptions. Children are easier to buy for than adults so they will still get actual presents, but the adults are getting fussy.

And by adults, I mean one person. One person who believes in name brands and stuff that I just can’t bring myself to care about. I don’t care about Gucci sunglasses nor Louis V’s purses.  In her case, the thought doesn’t count. How do I know? You should have seen her face when she opened my present and when her husband opened my present.  It’s always great to see the look of disgust.  Which I don’t understand, because it was a really pretty shirt.  The best part came when she told her husband that he was not allowed to wear his present in her presence.

Oh please. The thought that counts? Indeed. Nope, I think next year, I’ll put all my effort into the homemade Christmas cards I didn’t bother doing this year (much to the disappointment of a few family members shockingly enough.)

Am I being vindictive? Just a little. But, you know, I am sick of this accepting gifts graciously to your face and bad-mouthing behind the back. So, commercially, screw Christmas. It isn’t about presents but about love and remembering the importance of the holiday anyways.

Word of the Day

Being the nut that I am, I watch a lot of anime and Asian drama, even some Asian reality shows.  The more I watch, the more I pick up on certain words.  With subtitles, and understanding the situations these words are constantly being used in, I garner understanding  and am slowly building up a (pathetically puny) arsenal of words in Japanese, Korean, and Mandarin.

Today’s Word of the Day:
Chingu (chin-gu) 친구

After watching 12+ episodes of Taste Sweet Love, I have come to learn the word “chingu” which means friend in Korean.  I am excited every time I can recognize a new word. Maybe my capacity for learning languages isn’t as deplorable as I thought, then again, probably not. My German and Spanish are practically nonexistent.

Unnecessarily Complicated

“Love and marriage, love and marriage go together like a horse and carriage . . .”

Ah, the good old days of watching the Bundys.  Not that this has anything to do with what I am talking about.  I just find the expectations placed on people amusing. And by expectations, I am referring to love, marriage, and children. Quite honestly, I do not understand the attraction of either marriage or children.

Gasp! Heaven forbid that I as a female would say that I do not believe in marriage and children. That makes me unnatural. Well, not that I truthfully care what others think, but I believe being “unnatural” is better in this day and age.  With an absurdly high divorce  rate, I have no intention of jumping into marriage or even getting married at all.

I have seen marriages fail. Multiple times. I have seen people together who should never have married in the first place and now live together in misery because they don’t want to admit they made a mistake. Divorce is wrong.  No, divorce is not wrong. Rushing into marriage before discussing the important things is wrong. But what would I know?

Well, let’s see. My parents were extremely incompatible and probably should have never married. When my dad remarried, it was like repeating the same mistake over. So, at the ripe old age of 39, my dad has been thrice married, twice divorced, which is better than my cousin’s track record who has been thrice married, twice divorced at a much younger age.

Even though I grew up in the loving two parent home of my grandparents, I have come to realize that I have no desire to get married. I really also have no desire to have children either. I like kids, but I know that I am not mother material and that I honestly do not want to raise any. People believe I will change my mind. It is entirely possible, but not foreseeable for quite some time at least.

My elder sister is happily married and is now expecting her first child. I am happy that she has found love and is fulfilling her dream of becoming a mother. I am not envious of her and her spouse. Marriage and motherhood have always been her dreams, never mine. At one point I thought I had those dreams too, but really that was me accepting what other people thought, not what I actually desired.

I know that I am not alone in feeling this way, but it always irks me that people think that this mentality is not normal. Friends tell me I have to get married and have children, so our kids can be friends and grow up together. Unfortunately, for them, I don’t plan on changing my mind. If I do, I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it, but I have realized in the past few years, I honestly do not desire the institution of marriage nor do I wish to bear children and as the years pass, that seems to become more firmly  rooted, not less.

Let the chips fall where they may. No one knows what ride life has in store for them.

Experiment # 2

This experiment was one with rhyme. Internal versus end rhyme. I know how people today tend to dislike rhyme, mainly due to nursery rhyme and sing-song schemes which make reading poetry annoying.  So I challenged myself to see what I could do, and I thought I didn’t make it to childish.

 

And so now we are here:
I no longer me,
you no longer thee,
two combined to we

And yet . . .

I am still me, still she
you are still thee, still he.
Nothing has changed.

Everything has changed

We – two individuals.
We – two halves of the same whole.
This is where you and I end
because this is where “we” begin.

Codependency is fine
as long as I am still me, still she;
as long as you are still thee, still he.
As long as we don’t lose ourselves
in this amalgamation.

I (she) can live without you
I (we) does not want to.

This is the same for you (he), you (we).
That is you. That is me. This is we.

Teacher say what?

2/3, 2÷3. No matter what way you slice it, it means 2 divided by 3, which means the 2 is going inside the division box and the 3 is going on the outside.  I told my students the numerator of a fraction is always on the inside, the denominator always on the outside of the division box.  And if it is written out like the second one, the number to the left always goes inside and the number to the right of the sign always goes outside.

It is a pretty hard and fast rule. But I have that one person who loves to challenge me. And he isn't asking 'why,' but rather he is challenging me by saying that it isn't true. No. It is ALWAYS true. But for whatever reason, he and most of my students have a tendency to due the exact opposite, especially when the dividend is smaller than the divisor.

In developmental math we deal with positive numbers only, so my students know they always put the larger number first when subtracting.  They apply this logic with division as well, which makes no sense.  Sometimes you are going to get things that are less than one. Fractions and percents are technically less than one.  Heaven forbid.  I give them 7÷12 and ask them which number goes inside our division box. Their answer: 12.  They don't like to have numbers less than one apparently.  No. You have to deal with parts of wholes and not always wholes, which make them less than enthusiastic.

A whole semester has now passed, finals are looming and one of my fears (besides people royally screwing up area, perimeter, circumference, and radii/diameters) is that they'll go back to dividing wrong. We shall see, I suppose.

I have another student who challenges me, not with division, but saying that I have not told him how to do something properly.  I spend an entire half hour instructing these students on how to work things out step by agonizing step.  Granted, that is not a lot of time, given the amount of questions they have some days, but I go over formulas and setups, stressing each and every one.  When he said that the other day, I was like I just went over and over how to do these for an entire half hour.  And what, praytell, was he doing during that time?  Either listening to his MP3 player or messing around on his laptop.  So how is it ME not telling him what to do?

One day he got so fed up with me.  There was a breakdown of communication regarding finding the area and circumference of a circle and he was getting snotty with me telling me I was not explaining it right, that he was only doing it exactly the way I told him to.  And I must admit, my patience has run out with him (and with one or two others as well).  I got a little testy with him.  Not a solution, but by that time after explaining and re-explaining and doing more examples, I was just a little peeved. What to do?

Thank god the end of the semester is here.  There are students I'll miss and students that I can't wait to never see again.

Picture of the Month

http://bit.ly/6lsqi2

Seriously, I love this picture, it is awesome. This was taken in Overland Park, KS.  I found it on Bob Sommer's Uncommon Hours as I was adding it to NewPages Guide to Blogs by Poets and Writers.  Priceless and clever. Take a look.

Musing #1

I sometimes wonder what they are doing, how they are. Sometimes more than I am ever willing to admit. They were there, we were friends, but in the blink of an eye, all that seems to have disappeared. Apparently, absence does not make the heart grow fonder. No. It makes the heart forget. Or maybe it has shown that what you thought was real may have never existed. The great thing about that being that you will never know because it is doubtful the person will ever tell you themselves.

I am thinking about her again. Thinking and thinking, but not talking. I don’t know what to say anymore. ‘I am sorry’ doesn’t seem quite right, I don’t think I have anything to apologize for. ‘I miss you’ sounds so inane, but it is surprisingly true. I miss her. She was my best friend for so long.

So what do you do after you lose touch? After a friendship has grown cold? I actually ventured onto Facebook to try to talk to her, but I just couldn’t figure out what to say. “Hi.” It is really inane and she probably won’t reply to me, she never has whenever I have tried talking to her before. I am sorry for that.

I wish we hadn’t grown apart. I wish we hadn’t stopped talking. I wish I knew why things ended up this way, but I don’t have a clue. So we remain as strangers who were once friends. High school acquaintances and nothing more. I wish it were more.

Another mystery that hurts my brain entirely too much.

You’re Beautiful

http://wiki.d-addicts.com/You%27re_Beautiful

In reference to the Korean drama, not the James Blunt song.  I have just finished watching the drama and was please with its outcome. At first I thought it was silly and ridiculous, but it hooks a viewer in.

The eye and ear candy helped of course. Jang Geun Suk, Lee Hong Ki, Park Shin Hye, and Jung Yong Hwa did an excellent job posing as a band and their singing was awesome.  I love the soundtrack. The only bad part is like all soundtracks, it doesn’t have all the music you want, but at least it has most of it.  I really want the Jang Geun Suk version of “What Can I Do?” a very poignant song about losing the person you love and watching helplessly as they do so.

Now, if only I actually understood Korean a little more than I do. I really do enjoy their dramas.  Taiwanese and Japanese dramas are good too.  And why I am watching foreign dramas versus American?

1. Most of the American dramas I like get cancelled

2. The rest turn to crap because of interminable seasons where writers manage to screw up what was once enjoyable.

Definitely something to check out.  There are a lot of websites with English subtitles now.

Everything I Want to Say about Twilight But Can’t

Perusing the web, there is an online review about New Moon, the second movie in the Twilight Saga, published by USA Today. While listening to this article, I believe that author nicely sums up all my problems that this series has, but that I cannot not elucidate nicely.
http://www.usatoday.com/life/movies/reviews/2009-11-19-twilight-new-moon_N.htm
I was in my math class today and my students were irate with my opinion of the Twilight series because I expressed my dislike for the overly maudlin tale. And though I found the movie okay, I can honestly admit that it was not my most favorite film and that it actually lacked quite a bit from making it better.
And for all those Twilight lovers, take it with a grain of salt. Everyone’s taste is different. I would like to point out that there are actually better werewolf and vampire media out there, you just need to know where to find it. ^_^
Anne Rice can be long-winded and overly descriptive and I admit that Louie’s story is boring and difficult to get into, but honestly, her vampire books are just plain good – especially those told in Lestat’s voice. I highly recommend The Vampire Lestat and Queen of the Damned. Now, for tweens and teens, L.J. Smith’s Vampire Diaries series isn’t all that bad. I can read all four books all the way through without skipping pages due to saccharine and overly angsty crap.
Another good one for teens is Companions of the Night. Bittersweet ending, but not bad writing at all, again something I can read all the way through and enjoy.
Speaking of werewolves, Blood and Chocolate is a great read, although they distinguish themselves from werewolves as something like it, but not exactly a werewolf. I would skip the movie. It was crap and did not follow the plot line of the book at all. But again, not bad, not too angsty and a lot more enjoyable than Twilight.
So, yeah. To each their own.

Contradictions # 1

1) Being extremely organized when it comes to work and school while home is chaotic

Really my bedroom is in complete disorder, but when it comes to stuff for work and school, I am an organizing freak. And when it comes to the kitchen and the living room movie cabinet, everything has its own place and I get upset and irate if it’s not where it’s supposed to be.

It always amuses me when people compliment me on my thoroughness and my organizational skills. I tend to think to myself if they only knew. Yes, I can be extremely thorough and highly organized, as long as it does not apply directly to me and what is going on in my life outside of the realm of school or work.

But, no one ever said that a person has to make sense, right?

Huzzah!

Woot! First deer of the season! Granted, I do not hunt. I am not a fan of using guns and the last time I shot a rifle/shotgun was when my dad and grandfather took my sister and I out to the sandlot so they could do target practice in elementary school. However, I am a huge fan of venison. For those who have never actually tasted venison, it is got a unique flavor and is just damn good; however, it has a lot of protein which can negatively affect certain people.

But, yeah. My grandfather was all worried that he wouldn't get his deer because all he saw was little, dinky deer up at his hunting shanty (now, before deer season, he actually saw some nice size bucks/does, but not-so-much since rifle season started). But today he bagged a nice 8-point buck. He estimates about 135 pounds or so.

My grandmother is happy, too bad she is one of the people who can't handle the protein-rich venison. I am ecstatic because our venison supply was running low. So now we can restock our freezer as soon as we get the deer back from processing. Yes, my grandfather can process his own deer, only problem is we can't make hamburger ourselves, so we must ship it off to the slaughterhouse my grandfather used to work at so we can get some nicely ground venison. And just plain venison, no pork or beef added to it to make it . . . firmer?

Good luck to all those hunters out there!

Experiment #1

I am unhappy. I am not happy. Why? Es geht mir unglucklich. Es geht mir unglucklich. Warum? I don’t remember. Was there ever a reason? Was I ever happy? I am not happy. I am not happy. I am unhappy. Happy I am not.

I hide it. I don’t want them to know I am unhappy.

There is no reason.

 

 

 

                                                There is a reason . . .

I AM BROKEN

*Disclaimer: I am not unhappy, this was a form experiment gone amuck because the blog format can’t really show what was going on spatially.

Two Words

The weekend is almost here. I desperately want it to be here to escape from school for awhile. Tutoring in and of itself can be exhausting, especially when dealing with certain kinds of students. So, I say with joy, TGIT! I don’t work Fridays so TGIT indeed.

That is not the purpose of this post, though. Actually it is about two words that people should never use, or should use a heck of a lot less. Any ideas? I am sure there are plenty of two word phrases you shouldn’t use, but there is one that really needs to be moderated carefully: “I Promise.”

Why should these words be used with discretion? Think about the implications and messes caused by these two words alone (especially in regards to children). Hurt feelings and misunderstandings come with each broken promise, not to mention that a person’s faith and trust fails a little more each time a person breaks a promise.

The words “I promise” are used entirely too readily, without truly regarding whether or not what follows those words can actually be done. This is of course, not including people who promise just to promise and really have no intention of ever going through with their word. But you can usually figure out (albeit after a few disappointments) that you take what those people say with a grain of salt. No, the real problem lies with the unintentionally broken promise.

A person can make a promise and then fully intend to go through with it, but life just is not predictable. Things can change at a moments notice and before you know it, you could have just hurt someone by breaking the promise you were so sure you could fulfill. They say “hell hath no fury like that of a woman scorned” and that is true, but it’s even worse to witness a child’s disappointment in you and it hurts to see them begin to go down the path of not trusting a word that parents or adults say. Though you really shouldn’t trust all parents and adults, it’s still hurtful to watch.

I have learned not to use those words, even if I am pretty sure I can actually achieve what I would promise. It is in fact a family rule to not make promises. If you don’t make them, you can’t break them and feelings can be spared and misunderstandings avoided. So next time those words are about to come out of your mouth, you might want to step back and think.

And does this have any basis whatsoever to my beginning? Yes, it actually does. I have made plans and definitely wanted to see them through, but it looks like my careful planning might come to naught. So, I have made it my responsibility to tell the friend I was supposed to visit that “I make no promises” because living with someone whose health is not good, it is hard to make plans and stick to them every time. Responsibility is grand.

Community College: Good yet Evil

First off, I should probably say that I have never actually attended a community college.  I jumped right into a 4-year private institution right after high school. However, I currently work for a community college.  Now, the great thing about community colleges are the variety of classes they offer (some that even I couldn’t get in Adrian), the crazy hours for flexibility for working parents and workers in general, and price.  They tend to be cheaper per credit hour than any other institution of higher education.

I believe that community college is a great step, particularly for people who are yet unsure of what they want to do.  It’s also  a great way to get certification/accreditation without shelling out a fortune.  It can also help pave the way for people to enter a 4-year university or college.  It is a stepping stone and an alternative to the overpriced educational system we have in the US.

However, my main problem with community college is the “open door policy.”  This is not to say that people who could not (or would have trouble) get into a 4-year college should be denied in their quest for knowledge/education.  It is just to say there are some people who, in all horrible honesty, should not be in college. Some students just do not have the skill or the cognitive processes to handle college.

They are allowed in.  Usually placed in developmental classes which, if they fail, means that they cannot proceed to any higher classes that require the most basic of skills.  And the best part is the 3-strike policy: fail three times and you cannot retake the class for sometime, and if you had aid, it would no longer cover the failed thrice classes.

There are students who try their hardest, do their best and fall flat on their face.  They are not to blame. Our society is cramming education down our throats.  However, not every job out there requires a post-secondary education.  Despite the downward trend in the economy, trade jobs still exist, and other service oriented jobs that do not require a college diploma.

But you will still find people flocking to community colleges, wasting money on an education that will essentially get them no where if they cannot pass the classes they need to.  Community colleges won’t change the policy because there are those who will do well even without the requirements necessary for other 4-year institutions.

How do we find an effective admittance policy that will help everyone, without being discriminatory to those who are not, and may never be, at the college level?  It is a quandary that will not go away any time soon. And people will suffer, just as people will prosper because of it.

Men are stupid! - A chronicle of Chani's search for romance

Chani's taking over the blog! Come on NeeNee/Leighton it's your turn to make an entry! :)

Anyway, blogging is fun! I am just realizing this now, although I avoided it like the plaque for a number of years. But it's a really good way to get your thoughts out, and at the same time share them with others. Hopefully that helps diminish my frustrations on this topic: Namely that of finding a nice man for myself. EASIER SAID THAN DONE!!

Someone once told me that it would be much easier if we all walked around with our future spouse's name tattooed to our foreheads! I must say I agree! It would be so much easier to find who I'm looking for.

Anyway, after many years of not being in a relationship, upon my entry into grad school I decided that it was time to seriously start looking for somebody. Well, where do you meet people? My mom told me about a friend of the family (my "cousin" we call him) and that after moving to Seattle he joined Match.com just because it's a way to meet people outside of bars/clubs. I'm definitely not interested in meeting people at bars/clubs (figure they'd mostly be perverts right? Well this becomes rather ironic as you'll notice if you read on). So I shelled out the money and joined Match.com. At first my hopes were high! All those success stories about online dating can't be wrong, right? Unfortunately they must fail to mention all the attempted relationships that go wrong before people find the "right" one that they shamelessly tote on their site (and of course all the money people shell out to be site members for long enough to meet that person, but that's a different story altogether).

So I won't be using any names but the first person that I went out with was a total flop. Talk about starting off on the wrong foot, the biggest pervert I've met yet in my online dating journey was, of course, the first guy I tried to date. First of all (and I guess it should have been a warning sign but I had very little experience to start off with) he asks me all these disgusting, extremely personal questions while we IM to "get to know each other". Things like, what kind of underwear do I wear, where do I like to be touched, what are my "shaving habits" - and he didn't mean legs or armpits that's for sure! I know, I know, I should have stopped communication with him right then and there, especially when I haven't even met the guy and the conversation turns to sex every other word. But (like the naive, inexperienced person that I am) I just figured, 'well, all guys must be like this'. HAH! That's all I have to say is, HAH! But at the time that's what I figured. And I didn't really tell anybody else about these things (I told my mom a little bit, enough for her to think 'well, he seems a little forward but otherwise ok', but I didn't tell her everything - well the things we talked about were so personal I don't want to talk about them with anybody, that's how bad he was! And this for my first online dating experience! Ugh!). I did ask a girl at work if it was normal for a guy to ask stupid questions like "What are you wearing?" (this guy asked that every single freakin' day) and she kind of laughed and said "sometimes". Well, "sometimes" and "every single day" are two very different things, my friends. I just wish now that I hadn't ignored all the warning signs back then.

Well, anyway, to make a long story short, we went out on our "first" date, and he insisted upon groping me while playing pool, asking about my underwear some more, and trying to make out (tongue, ear biting, hand fondling - not "holding", fondling while I held my hand limp like some kind of submissive freak - the whole shebang!)while in the movie theater. Never mind that I think that kind of PDA is not appropriate, simply because it would annoy me if some couple was acting like that in front of ME while I tried to watch a movie in the theater) but on our FIRST date! So I was uncomfortable and put a stop to it. Then he's all like "you didn't seem very interested" blah blah afterwards. I told him on our few post-date IM's that it was moving too fast for me and I'd rather move slower, and he completely failed to understand what I was talking about. Even went so far as to basically say he "can't" move any slower than that. Like he's incapable. And I remember on one of my earliest IM's with him he was telling me that he had dated quite a few girls on Match.com but none of them wanted to see him past a first date. Well I WONDER WHY! I mean seriously how stupid and clueless can you be!? His thoughts were "you should at least give somebody a second chance before making a final judgement" and I agree under normal circumstances, but when he's acting like THAT, I think second chances can be overlooked.

So anyway, I continued on Match.com throughout the ending of my subscription. Then I joined eHarmony (another large sum) before finding a place called "plentyoffish.com that is just as good as these others sites but FREE! Needless to say I'm sticking with that one from now on). But over the course of the number of men I have dated while being a member of these sites (and it's been like 1.5 years of this now) I've met a slew of perverts. It's either perverts, or guys who move SO slow I lose interest. Now, I don't think appearance is a problem, I have found that the crushes I've had in the past have been based more upon personality than looks, and once I like somebody's personality I find that they look very attractive to me. The problem is that most of these guys won't give me a CHANCE to get to know their personalities! Maybe that's the problem with online dating - I don't know. Maybe guys figure since its clear we're looking for a romantic relationship on the site, the "romance" should start on the first date. Well, I don't think that meeting on line should be a ticket to bypass the "getting to know each other part". It's sad, because I find the people I meet online often like me - but I don't like them! But then whenever I like a guy that I meet in real life, he doesn't like me! I seem to be trapped. It's hopeless but I'm still hoping! How pathetic? I don't know. *sigh*

Anyway, my biggest beef with the perverted men online is their insistence to talk about sex right away, when I still barely know them. There have been at least 3 other guys I've talked to that behave in this manner (most of them I haven't gone on any dates with though, thankfully). First, okay, I don't have a lot of experience. In fact, I'm a virgin. So one of the first responses I inevitably get is shock, then questions like I'm some kind of museum specimen. One guy said he found it "fascinating" that I'm still a virgin at 25 and needed to grill me on why for like 20 minutes before I finally blocked him off of yahoo. Now, first of all, until I'm close to you, it is NONE OF YOUR FREAKIN' BEESWAX if I am a virgin or not! Number two, ok, so I'm a virgin at 25. WHAT'S WRONG WITH THAT!? Inevitably their first question is whether I am "saving myself" for marriage. Well, the answer is no, I am not. If I'm "saving myself" for anything, it's love. And frankly, I haven't been in very many relationships. The longest was 2 months with a guy I wasn't especially interested in back in my second year of undergrad. If I haven't had any serious relationships, why should I have had sex? It's as simple as that. Nothing special, nothing "pure" or "prudish", nothing weird. I've just never been in such a situation. However, even when I tell guys this, they still don't understand. I even had one guy (the guy I blocked, thankfully) refer to me as an "anti-girl" who "hates everything". Now pardon my language but WHAT THE FUDGECICLE DOES THAT MEAN!? All we were talking about (and this was the first time we talked, by the way)was that I don't know when in a relationship I'd be ready for sex, and that I think it's not something we should focus on right away, and that I'd had no real sexual experiences thus far. Now look, just because I'm not "easy" doesn't make me a prude! I mean, I know that men are, to a certain extent, SUPPOSED to be obsessed with sex, for evolutionary reasons and all that, but I know that not all guys are this bad. My mom said to me, after hearing the whole story about "Pervert # 1" discussed above, that she can't imagine decent men behaving that way. And that she could never see my cousin acting in that way towards a girl. And she's right, I couldn't see it either. There ARE nice, good guys out there, so why can't I meet them!? Why do all the guys I get stuck with insist upon judging me so much? I'm sure I could be a very sensual/passionate person once I felt close to a guy, but I haven't felt close to a guy yet. That's all. And I don't think that when just meeting a person sex should even be a topic of discussion. If it happens, it happens, and if the relationship is the right one, then it WILL happen. Why grill me on it? Just let things go as they will. I look at it this way: I'm not a touchy-feely person in general; I don't like to even HUG people unless I feel close to them emotionally. By the same token, I wouldn't want to have SEX with somebody until I felt close to them emotionally. Now, call me crazy, but I think that makes a lot of sense. Problem is, I can't get close to anybody emotionally because all I meet are perverts (or weirdos, but that's a different bunch that I will not be discussing in this blog).

Now you say probably I should stop trying to meet guys online, but the problem is that I don't have success in real life either. In fact, recently, I've seriously considered giving up. CNS Speak is for three undergrad friends, who decided together (half-jokingly, but half not) that we should get a "Spinster's Mansion" once we are all rich and move in together, and have a GIANT library and just be happy being single! I LOVE the idea! At least it's better than my previous back-up plan, living in an apartment with a bunch of cats. lol. But recently I've been thinking it would just be better, and easier, to seriously go through with it (assuming we all become rich enough, of course - once we're famous authors, you know :-P). Leighton Nichols has so many good points when it comes to romance (which she has professed to not be interested in on multiple occasions). Why should you rely on somebody else to make you happy? Why not be just happy with yourself as who you are? What's wrong with being single if you're satisfied with your life? I think about these points, and can't help but see their merit. Plus it saves you a lot of heartache and frustration. And yet, to be honest, I have not given up on meeting somebody that's right for me. Yes, I'm a hopeless romantic. I still believe that "Mr. Right" is out there somewhere. I have times whre I'm dejected and just want to give up the search, but then times where I want to keep looking. Leighton and I have had many discussions on the topic, and at first I was resentful of her opinion, but I have matured a lot, and now I think that each person has to find their own type of happiness. Maybe not everybody needs or wants a romantic relationship. And that's okay! But me... I still want one. But I'm grateful for the discussions that she and I have had, because they make me realize that even if I don't meet somebody I can still be happy just being myself with friends who understand me. And for that I am grateful. But I don't think that I approach a romantic relationship too unrealistically either. I know that just meeting someone isn't "an end in and of itself" as a coworker once put it. I know it won't fix all the problems in my life, and it will even create problems of its own! But I think that, for me, the positives of meeting somebody will outweigh the negatives. Another friend was recently telling me how true that is of her and her husband. Some things are worse now that they're married, but MORE things are better. And she will never regret marrying him. Life will never be perfect. We should just do what we can that makes us happy, and for each person this is different. But the one thing we have in common is that we are all striving to find our own kind of happiness.

That said, I still hope to meet that person someday. And I will keep trying my best. If I go to a new state for my Ph.D. program next year maybe it will give me a fresh outlook and I can meet new people. If not, my plan is to try to join in on more social activities (on campus or off) to meet more people that way. And of course I'll maintain my profile on plentyoffish.com, just in case a nice, normal person decides to show up. Maybe I should make it mandatory that men on the site read this blog before contacting me! Lol! Anyway, wish me luck, but NeeNee... keep my spot in that Spinster's Mansion open, okay? I just might need it! ^_^

My Thoughts on Twilight

Chani's back!

So I'll try to make this post a bit shorter than the previous one, but NeeNee's response to my angst post made me think about Twilight as well.

First, my ultimate coming off of Twilight thoughts are: It is entertaining, but will never be great literature. In other words, I liked it. I enjoyed reading it. But I don't understand wacko fangirls. And as a person with some experience in English and Creative writing (not as much as NeeNee, though) I will be the first to admit that the books are not really written well. Now, unlike NeeNee, I actually like books 3 & 4 better than 1 & 2, but not because of Bella and Edward. In fact, aside from Rosalie (who I also like to call the "Queen Bitch of the Universe") and Emmett (I find him to be an obnoxious jock), Bella and Edward are probably my least favorite characters in the story. I much prefer Carlisle, Esme, Alice, Jasper, Jacob, and Renesmee. And the Volturi are pretty cool in their own freaky way (I like Aro and Marcus, not so much Caius). But anyway, I like Bella and Edward so little mostly, as NeeNee said, because of their angst. And here are three specific things I don't like about them: :-P

1. Bella's incessant description of Edward's voice as "velvet". Also, honey (for his eyes and maybe his voice sometimes too? I don't remember). I mean, the girl NEVER stops swooning over him. And frankly he can't be that perfect. I mean I'm all for keeping the romance alive but COME ON. Does she have to swoon EVERY TIME he comes near her? Get over it! Especially once you've been together for awhile, the novelty should wear off. I don't care if he's a super-hot vampire, the novelty should wear off! At least a little bit! And enough about his velvet voice already!!!

2. Edward's angst: (note sarcasm in my imitation of him). "Oh, I'm so evil and horrible and I don't have a soul and I'm a monster and why does Bella love me and she should be afraid of me and she shouldn't want to be a vampire and I have to keep her as a human and I'm so terrible and why does she want to stay with me oh how evil and horrible and worthless I am!" *Eye roll* First, he ought to respect Bella and not be so condescending to her all the time. She's grown up enough to make her own decisions. Second, seriously dude, get over yourself! You're not a monster, you hold back, you care, you don't kill people, if she loves you just accept it and let it go, especially if she makes you happy. Your biggest problem is that you put yourself down too much for no good reason. The rest of his family doesn't do that! The author seems to imply it's because he's been alone for so long, but it also seems to imply that he's been alone by choice. So is his alone-ness causing his attitude, or vice-versa? Just a thought.

3. Bella's angst: (note more sarcasm). "Oh look at poor little me I'm so weird and I'm awkward and clumsy and unusual and obviously not pretty or glamorous why does he love me I'm not so great oh I am so unworthy of his love because he's so glorious and I'm plain and ordinary and so not-special and not pretty and oh I am unworthy I am unworthy why does he love me?" Again: GET OVER YOURSELF!!! Geez these two and their lack of confidence in themselves and Bella's self-esteem issues! They say you can't be loved by another person if you don't love yourself first. Makes me wonder how these two ever got together! Nobody wants to be with somebody who's always depressed and down on him/herself. At least I personally am turned off by people with no self-esteem. But whatever.

Ok, I'm done now. :)

3. Bella's angst

Emo/Angst in EVERY Culture

But really, Chani has a point about emo and angst. They are very popular and well, as the great Charles Baxter puts it, "Hell sells." Why? Unfortunately, people lose interest in things if they are plain ol' happily ever after stories. Truthfully, conflict is needed. However, anime and manga in general do have a tendency to have some of the worst qualities of American soap operas. Basically meaning that a couple must go through every trial possible (which gets ridiculous after a certain point) just in order to be together. Please, family disapproval, enemies attacking from all sides (literary AND figuratively) is too much and the odds are actually against that many obstacles appearing (simultaneously AND in succession).

But it is not just in anime and manga. It is there in Asian drama, American soap operas and even prime time television now. It's getting worse, not better which makes television even more annoying. Charter calls continuosly and I can honestly say that I just don't watch that much tv because there is really too much crap out there.

And you want emo and angst? Check out Stephanie Myers Twilight series. OMG, talk about emo and angst. The first book was fine, the second book saw a dramatic increase and books 3 and 4? Fuh-gettaboutit. It is seriously ridiculous. So, I guess you can say there is no entertainment venue safe from emo and angst and I believe that this is totally different than Baxter implies with his quote. Sure, hell sells, but we're not talking about climbing through the seven circles while everyone is against you.

Too much is too much. Moderation is key. We need moderation in the anime and manga and literature and movies today. Melodrama will always be present (unfortunately, my much loved Escaflowne can be emo and angsty as well - but not quite to the evil extent of today), so how bout we tone it down just a little?

Wacko Poem and ranting about anime and angst

Hello Bloggers! My name is Chani and I am the "C" of "CNS Speak". Sooooooo, I've never blogged before but hopefully I can start off with a bang. NeeNee, also known as Leighton Nickols, the "N" of "CNS Speak" has requested that I post an original poem I composed last night completely randomly. Five of us were hanging out together and we each picked one word. The words were:

Picture
Sarcophagus
Cocain
Why
What

Clearly some of us were more creative than others :-P, however my assignment should I choose to accept it, was to compose a poem using all five of those words. Now fiction writing is more my forte than poetry, and I am not ashamed to admit it, so I didn't take too much time in writing this poem. Note that my observations of a lot of art (not all of it, just a large amount) have made me notice (unfortunately) that apparently the more angsty and emo your art, the better it is (anime as well, but I'll get to that later). So I pulled that in a little bit, kind of as a joke, but also kind of expressing my frustration. However, nothing really deep went into this poem. I wrote it in like literally two minutes anyhow so don't think too much about it and just enjoy! :-P


Why sarcophagus?
Picture cocaine - filling me with angst
What image conjures
Through the darkness
Of Death
And buttons
Through the wind and rain I see pictures of life
Of death
Of sarcophagi
And phagus means eat
Like food
And phytophagus
Knowing words and their roots and meanings
And yet wishing for art
And balance
But not angst
Do not make me emo
I love life
And yet
How
Why
What
Where
When
Will I find
Something like cocaine
To keep me away from angst
And towards the light?
But not drugs
And never
Never
Never
Give up
Keep going
For better or worse
And still
Go

Yeah, sooooo.... very random! But what do you expect in two minutes? lol. Anyway now I want to rant about the terms "angsty" and "emo". It seems that these days things are considered "cool" if they are angsty or emo. ESPECIALLY anime. I was talking to a guy at work over the summer and somehow the subject turned to anime and why he doesn't like it and I do. Now, I took some offense to him saying that I "like anime". And why is this? Well, I guess if you want to be technical I do like anime. What I have a PROBLEM with is people who say they "like anime" just because it's anime. Like anything: crime shows, sitcoms, dramas, movies, cartoons, whatever, there are many varieties of anime. I used to, when I was younger, and before I went to Japan (going to Japan, as you will see later, is a big factor in all of this), like pretty much every anime out there, partly because there wasn't much available in the US at the time. Anime fans these days are spoiled, I tell you! But now I realize that some anime are just dumb. Some shows are better than others, like anything. Yes, I like the animation style, but some drawings are better than others, and I also like Disney animation, Pixar computer-animated stuff, you name it. Really to classify all anime as the same is terribly annoying. So I tell my co-worker, no I do not "like anime just because it's anime". I like certain shows because they are interesting, and have good plots and characters. So I object to people telling me that I just "like anime". I prefer more detail than that in my explanation. In addition, I went on to tell him that most of the more modern anime (Bleach, Naruto, Full Metal Alchemist, Death Note) I'm not into. I like older stuff (Sailor Moon, Rayearth, Cardcaptor Sakura, Urusei Yatsura, Evangelion, Escaflowne, Ranma 1/2, to name a few). Partly because at this point in my life I don't have the money to get into any long, new shows (I like buying the DVDs), but also because too much of the current popular anime is angsty and emo. This led us to discuss Death Note in particular. Now, granted, please take my comments about Death Note with a grain of salt and don't get offended. I have not actually watched or read Death Note, I'm just making observations based on what I've heard and read about it. And I don't know for sure how much of that is accurate, but the impression I get is that it's VERY angsty and emo and people like it just for that reason. Now I ask, what's so good about being depressed? I mean, I understand that for a story to be interesting there has to be conflict, people can't be happy all the time, and that's fine, but really to just have characters be angsty and emo because it's "cool", I mean , come on! At any rate, another thing that annoys me about death note is that the main character's name is Light and his archenemy (I think, from what I read) is named L. Now what the heck is up with this!? First off, the word "light" starts with an "L" and it's almost like it's just Light's initials. Thats' weird! I mean when I first read stuff online about the show I didn't even know the difference between Light and L, and assumed they might be the same person. Which leads me to my next rant. The name "Light". Who the hell in Japan names their kid "Light?" It's an English name (I wouldn't even call it a name really, either, as I doubt any native english speaking person would name their kid "Light" either). Japanese people don't name English names! At least it would be ridiculously uncommon I would assume. Ok they used the name for symbolism purposes. I get that, but it would make more sense to call him "Hikaru", a male (or female) Japanese name meaning "Light". But Light? Really? Come on!

My next rant is about shounen-ai/yaoi. Now please don't read this as discriminatory. It is just the opposite. I have no problem with homosexuals. Some Japanese people, however, do. Girls in America gush and go on and on about the pretty boys, their "bishounen lovers" in shounen-ai/yaoi. I have even known people so obsessed with it that they insist on making shounen-ai pairs out of every male they like in every anime they see, even if there is NO REASONABLE BASIS for said characters to get together. It...drives...me... CRAZY! Now again I say don't assume I am discriminating because I happen to be a fan of some shounen-ai couples. Touya and Yukito from Cardcaptor Sakura are adorable. What I have a problem with is the insane fandom surrounding it and the complete lack of said fangirls to look deeper and realize that this depiction is actually BAD for real gay males in Japan. Remember anime-fans, Japan is a REAL country filled with REAL people! Real as in reality, life, not seen through a screen, and definitely not animated. I took a gender relations class when I spent my one-semester study abroad in Japan in 2006. It was one of the most interesting and insightful classes I have ever taken. And I learned so much. In Japan, there is still a real struggle for homosexual people to obtain their rights. I was so busy in Japan I did not get the opportunity to attend one of their actual rainbow parades but I wish I had been able to. We were, however, shown footage in class of some of these parades, and saw interviews with the real people participating in them. And we learned that the popular culture depictions of homosexuals, especially males, is considered offensive and degrading to some of the real homosexuals in the country. Homosexual males are not taken seriously. Their image is either of a silly crossdresser, or the stereotypical "shounen-ai" anime character. But they are REAL HUMAN BEINGS with jobs and with lives. Gay businessmen have an especially hard time, as other men have problems working with them. These are real people fighting for respect as human beings in a society that is still learning how to accept those that are different. I'm not saying you women out there can't be shounen-ai fans, but next time you want to go "squeeee!" about some bishounen-couple getting it on, I ask you to stop and think for a moment about the real people in a real society who want respect and understanding that their lifestyle choice when it comes to romantic relations has no bearing on their ability to work or think or be real successful contributors to society. Please think of these people. Think of reality. Respect others.

Finally I leave you with these thoughts. Anime is great. Anime is fun. Japan is a real country with real people. My thoughts when I were in Japan were that some things were better than in America, some things were not. In fact, it was about even, in my personal opinion. Both of our countries, like all countries on this Earth, have good and bad points, and the best way for any of our countries to improve is to learn from each other, communicate, and try to understand each other. The way homosexuals, women, day-to-day life, is depicted in anime is not always the way it is in the real country of Japan. Look around you. See people next to you in reality and realize that people just like that live in Japan too. Enjoy anime, but take it with a grain of salt. Remember that learning about another country is not only through pop-culture, but through history, cultural understanding, and communication.

Hopefully I haven't bogged you readers down too much with this, but I've had these thoughts for a long time after coming back from Japan and am really relieved to get them off of my chest!

By the way, if you get an opportunity to visit Japan, GO! It's great! And eat Takoyaki! I love it! :)

Till next time!

Chani out!

Word Game Challange

At my sister's with some friends for the weekend, we came up with a game. Every person got to choose one word and then Chani and I would each write a poem using the 5 words chosen by each of the people present.  The words are as follows:

JonG - Cocaine
Sis - What
JonS - Why
Chani - Picture
Me - Sarcophagus

So here is my very brief poem, currently untitled:

 Why, what light through yonder cocaine haze shines

on the brilliant sarcophagus

in the black-and-white picture

of my mind's naked eye

Chani-chan shall be posting her attempt at the word game challenge shortly. And I must admit her attempt at the word game more than likely wins over my brief attempt at pithy brilliance. It is utterly innovatively funny and yet totally random.

Enjoy 

Quote of the Day

"Please, for the love of God, proofread. A typo we can understand, but a complete and utter lack of the basic tenets of grammar is an affront to human decency."

I stole this from Jersey Devil Press's submission guidelines <http://www.jerseydevilpress.com/submissions/>. It made me chuckle and nod my head in understanding. I have received sample reviews from potential reviewers so full of grammar mistakes and typos it was horrible. If I had been the author and was submitting something like that for publication and as proof of my ability, I would be ashamed.

Quote of the Day

"Some people don't want to be compassionate. They want to be right."
~Unknown

But really, you know people who want to be right, all the time whether they are or not. So, what does this mean exactly? What does compassion and being right have to do with one another? I am not exactly sure. Maybe that's why I thought the quote was cool, all the different interpretations a person could get out of it.

Po-tay-toh, Po-tah-toh

The add old adage "you say po-tay-toh, I say po-tah-toh" is interesting. I am not talking about the meaning we get from this saying, but rather the fact that it is one word said two different ways. This is basically regional and where you grew up determines which pronunciation you use. It works with tomato and aunt as well as many other words.

What does this have to do with anything? Well, I wish to talk about one word, namely a name. The name being that of Leigh. So, how do you pronounce it? I am willing to bet that 99.99% of people will say Leigh is pronounced Lee. There is no other way to say it. Is that true?

Answer being, uh, no. It isn't true. There is another pronunciation to this name. What is it? It is lay. People scoff and sneer and say that makes no sense. Really? Let's take a wander down vocabularly lane, shall we? Evidence that it can (and probably should be) pronounced lay:

1. Sleigh (how do we say this word? slay! with the long a sound)
2. Raleigh (ok, some people will say raw-lee vs. raw-lay)
3. Eight (last time I checked it was pronounced ate, again long a sound)
4. Freight (frayte)
5. Weight (wait)
   

Enough with the word games. I know they are probably not the most convincing, but I just thought it was nice to point out. In the English language, what does the vowels 'ei' put together sound like? Think about feint (pronounced "faint" not "feent"). It is the "ie" combination that is actually pronounced as the long e sound versus the long a sound. Now, I am not saying that everytime "ei" is together it will be pronounced this way (like agreeing), but I am willing to say that the majority of words with "ei" should be pronounced with the long a sound.

So why do so many people pronounce Leigh as Lee vs. Lay? And why did I spend a whole blog post on this particular topic? Well, look at my name: Leighton Nichols (pronounced lay-ton). Tis a nom de plume, but Leighton is derived from my middle name, which is? You guessed it, Leigh. And no, it is not pronounced Lee. My father, for whatever confounding reason, gave me one of the commonest middle names and decided that it will be Lay vs. Lee.

It is a pet peeve of mine when people get the pronounciation of my middle name wrong. Petty? Probably, but it just annoys me. Just like when people start adding extra letters to my first name.

Twitter, Facebook

Social networking; sharing your status; and updating, updating, updating. Seriously, I wonder.

I joined Facebook at the behest of a friend. Back then (2004), Facebook was nice and uncluttered. Mainly, I just liked it for keeping in touch with old friends who I had lost contact with. Now it is a crazy place with way too much going on. My response to the . . . commercialization? or whatever you want to call it . . . stop going to Facebook. Which, now that I have finally visited it again after a few months, means I had a stockpile of over 100 requests. Seriously way too many.

What happened to Facebook being a social networking platform to keep in touch with people (or to find like-minded people if you are a social butterfly)?

Now there is Twitter. I don't understand it. I don't think that I want to either. It seems pointless. Especially when you have people updating their Twitter accounts every few minutes with inane information that it is hard to believe anyone would actually care about.

What is good about these two sites now?

150 Year Legacy

This weekend Adrian College will be celebrating its 150th anniversary. Quite a feat. Its roots go back to the civil war. In fact, Adrian College itself was involved in the abolitionist movement. So it has a rich and storied history.

A lot has changed since its inception in 1850. Hell, a lot has changed since I graduated in 2007. Resident halls have been redone (Pellowe has had a complete overhaul), apartments have been bought and built. There is now a skating rink and AC no longer has to share a football field with the local high school thanks to the completion of a stadium in 2006.

When I entered Adrian College in 2003, enrollment was down. A lot of people that I came in with didn't even make it past the first semester, or their first year. Now, enrollment is up and Adrian College has been ranked by US News & World Report as the #1Up-and-Coming Baccalaureate College in the Midwest for the 2nd year in a row.

So it is with even more enthusiasm that this 150 year anniversary is celebrated. Unfortunately, I can't make it to the festivities, but it promises to be a blast. Well, the part I will miss will be getting together with my former English professors, but I have plans to go to Adrian sometime in October.

A Proud Moment

Back in either my sophomore or junior year at Adrian College a group of fellow students and I decided we wanted a place where we could write and receive feedback without worrying about creating a portfolio for a grade, thus our idea of establishing a writing club was born. A few of my friends thought it was too much of a hassle to go through the process of becoming an officially recognized organization, but I went through the tiring process of paperwork, research, and building a constitution, along with my close friend Sassy.

After going through the paperwork approval and then the official approval by the board, The Pen & Ink Society was created. Membership was low, we didn’t advertise and initially decided to forgo any fees, probably not the best idea, but all we really wanted was a comfortable environment where fellow student writers could come for workshops and I think the initial generation did a good job with what we had.

Now, the creation of this club in and of itself was a proud moment, but that is not what I am so happy about today. While doing some research for work, I stumbled across one of the winning essays from Eastern Michigan University’s Education First Essay Contest.  I was shocked/proud to see one of the winners was Adrian College’s own Angie Palaian.

I met her just as my stint as the Pen & Ink Society’s acting president was over, but I remember her work as strong and powerful and I am happy to know that the club meant something to her and am glad to see her go on to bigger and better things, such as pursuing a career as a college professor.

Rock on!

Wake-Up Call for "Writers"

This amuses me. Not because it isn't the truth, but because I know of people who have this attitude about writing that is described in this edition of the Funds for Writers Newsletter. So enjoy the lovely realistic advice!

EDITOR'S THOUGHTS

Read newsletter online at: http://www.fundsforwriters.com/FFW.htm

Read past
issues at: http://www.aweber.com/z/article/?fundsforwriters
=====
I NEED A GRANT TO WRITE
Those of you who've been around me a few years must bear withthis message. I deliver these words in one shape or another about once a year, but always as a result of a flurry of emails from new readers. Folks see FUNDS for writers and believe I will swoop down with some stimulus package and fix all sorts of writing ills. I'm afraid I'm still unable to:
1. Find you an instant publisher.2. Find you a grant to complete your first book.3. Find you a grant to allow you to quit the job you hate.4. Find you a grant that allows you time to write that novel.5. Find funds to pay your bills while you write.
Honestly, I wish I could do all those things.
Let me solve some myths for you:
1. Almost all writers write while performing another job or chasing the kids. A tiny minutiae percentage of writers rises in the morning without worrying about day work or the bills. You write through the life handed to you, often making you a better writer thanks to the struggle.
2. Grants for writers go to those who've established themselves as writers. It's this comment that often makes people mad with me. How dare I accuse someone of not being a writer? After all, this person has written since the third grade or this other one has penned fourteen short stories and three journals of poetry over five years. How dare I? Actually, I'm not the one drawing the line in the sand. Look at this quote from the Mississippi Arts Commission about the definition of a writer - a quote representative of all the arts agencies: "...a professional artist producing work of high artisticquality, Individuals are considered to be professional ifthey: earn at least part of their annual income in their artistic work; consider their artistic endeavors as acareer; maintain a high level of artistic quality; andmake a significant time investment in their artisticdisciplines though practice, performance or production."
Some characteristics of a "professional" writer include:
== Writing income appearing on your tax return.== A calendar noting regular work, appearances, training undertaken as a writer.== A chronological list of submissions and copies of acceptances and rejections.== Receipts of expenses.== An active website/blog committed to writing.
3. Completing a book also does not make you a writer. You've written the words on the page, but are they edited to a fine sheen? Have you found a strong voice and claimed it as your own? Can someone pick up the work and tell from the style that it's yours? THE END does not mean you've arrived. Writing takes serious practice over multiple projects over several years. People do not pick up a pen and write bestsellers without personal development and lots of sweat.
Granted, you have a story to tell. But you have to becomea writer in order to tell it well and do it justice. Youdo not need a grant to write. You don't have a deadline topublish.
Harper Lee wrote one novel, To Kill a Mockingbird. Do youwant to be remembered for one brilliant story or notremembered after writing twenty-seven pieces over three years?
Put in the time and effort, and not only will you finda grant to help you financially, but you'll find credibility, too.

Another Tangled Google Mess

So I can’t explain this really well and I know it confuses the hell out of people who are actually dealing with it right now, so I am just going to post the link here:

http://beattiesbookblog.blogspot.com/2009/08/guild-responds-to-second-wme-letter-on.html

Nothing like copyright issues and settlement cases, but this is what people were concerned about long before Google was firmly cemented in their archive.

**A side note that has nothing to do with the Authors Guild/Google settlement, but I thought I would bring it up because it is irritating to an extent is that Facebook is now featured in Google searches. So, let’s say you want to Google a specific person, well if there are several people with that name in Facebook, those people will come up first, which, let’s face it, can be really annoying.  However, I don’t think I’ll switch my search engine to Bing just yet, their interface annoys they hell out of me.

G.I. Joe

I used to love watching the cartoon when I was a child so I was excited yet worried that they were making a live action. I guess I can’t be too disappointed granted that I can’t remember too much about the series as it has been close to 20 years since I have watched it.

The action sequences were decent. The CGI, well, you could tell whatever was CGI was indeed all computerized. It is interesting how some CGI you can hardly tell at all that it is computer generated and others you can tell and you seriously wonder if they actually tried to make it look realistic.

I did enjoy the movie. I loved Ray Park as Snake Eyes. It is funny how this martial artist actor always seems to play characters where you can’t see his face, i.e. Toad from X-men, Darth Maul from the Phantom Menace. I loved his fighting with his nemesis from Ninja school.

Speaking of his arch nemesis. Ok, there are many Japanese actors out there, they exist, so why was a Korean playing a Japanese ninja? I am just curious. The actor did a great job, if I didn’t know better, I suppose a person wouldn’t even know that he wasn’t Japanese, but I do, so I found it amusing. And, totally off topic, another Japanese Ninja movie will be coming out sometime later this year or next year and the main star is indeed another Korean, Rain. Is the reasoning behind this that all Asians supposedly “look alike” (which is not true, you can tell the difference between Koreans, Japanese, and Chinese, etc – if you know what you are looking for)? Just an interesting question to contemplate.

Back to the topic at hand. Yes, I liked G.I. Joe. Yes, it had cheesy acting and more action than anything else, but it was at least enjoyable, which is hard to say for some of the more recent movies I have seen.

Adobo Failure

So I was making a traditional Filipino dish called adobo. Basically, it is pork and chicken in a sauce. Well, I figured that if I followed the recipe it would work out fine. So not true. The recipe actually didn't work out at all. Apparently when it calls for 1 cup of vinegar, you should put in like an eighth of what it wants. It was vinegary as all hell. *shiver*

However, the Pansit turned out just fine. Although, it is a hella lot harder to screw up noodles, veggies and chicken. Hopefully when I try out the barbecue sauce recipe, it will actually work out. Hard to believe that these people writing out these recipes could actually make such an egregious error.

Warning Labels - Let Hilarity Ensue

At work I came across something I found to be fairly amusing: A book with a "warning" label . . . or perhaps "rating" label is more precise. It is reminiscent of how TV rates viewer programs, from child safe to all that fun stuff (I can't recall an exact one but I think there was one that have like 13 or 14 on it saying it was unsuitable for children below that age) and of how videogames are rated (E for everyone, M for mature).

Wolf Pirate Publishing is actually putting labels like these on the back of their books. Really. I just laughed when I saw it. Probably not as funny as I am making it out to be, but it seems ridiculous to me.

So, on the back of The Angel's Iscariot, there is a box with a big, bold M next to another box that descries "Contains: Adult situations, violence, and mature subject matter not appropriate for young readers." And on the back of The Repossession is a box with an R next to another box that reads "Contains: Adult situation, violence, sexual content and mature subject matter not appropriate for young readers."

Apparently sexual content is the only thing that is the difference between an R rating and an M rating. Shouldn't that be an X rating instead? And, truthfully, this stuff is found in basic sections, not children's sections, so is a label even necessary?

A Financial Quandry

Why is that institutions and programs that are supposed to be giving you money, always try to find ways to get out of it? Examples: Insurance Companies, Unemployment, and Medicare (which, technically, falls under insurance).

Oh, let’s start with unemployment. Besides the fact that money for unemployment is scarce due to the higher levels, especially in Michigan, they are really bad at getting money to people. Sometimes, even though a person is perfectly eligible to receive unemployment, they have to wait three to six months, sometimes longer, just to receive the biweekly unemployment they deserve, which in this economy is definitely a bad thing.

But that isn’t the bone I have to pick with unemployment.

It has been ingrained in all of us (or at least people who know anything about unemployment) that if you are a student (student here meaning college student) then you are unable to collect unemployment benefits even if you work full time while also going to school (full time or otherwise). This is actually not true. A student can collect unemployment (as long as they have proof of working full time and attending school – which really isn’t all that hard to get).

The problem is unemployment does not tell you this. There is nothing that is easily accessible on their website that gives you this information. A friend of mine applied for unemployment even though he was a student and unemployment sent him a letter rejecting his application and then they turned around, accepted it, and started to give him money, which they later claimed he owed them back + interest because he was a student.

Truthfully, a rather gross error on their part. But the kicker is that there is a waiver you need to fill out when submitting your application that applies solely to students that allows you to legally collect unemployment. However, like I said, nothing of this is actually mentioned on the website, or if it is, it’s buried so deep you will probably never find it. Of course, why would unemployment tell you this? They don’t want to give you money if they don’t have to.

Needless to say the matter went to court and my friend won and can legally collect unemployment. The whole process was drawn out over quite a few months and now he has to apply for an extension for his unemployment as his work still has not called him back yet.

Now, Medicare. All things considered, we pay an ungodly amount in taxes every year for Medicare and Social Security. (When you have to pay in taxes at the end of the year, it’s those two things above which kill you, not state or federal.) However, Medicare is getting more reluctant to pay. My grandmother was in the hospital in June and then again in September of last year. It took until just a few months ago this year before Humana and the hospital finally got Medicare to cough up the money they were supposed to pay from the beginning. And now, Medicare is trying to put into effect that they will not repay for repeat visits and treatments. Meaning if you have to go into the hospital more than once for the same thing, then you are essentially screwed.

For a service that is supposed to help the elderly, especially at a time when it is hardest for them to afford health insurance, Medicare isn’t really all that good. But, I am told that it is really hit and miss. Some people get care and help right away while others are shoved onto a shelf and left to dust.

I have no real hopes that Obama or the government can really do anything to reform health care because even the federal institutions are getting more and more reluctant to help anyone, not to mention, even with all the money paid into these programs vis-a-vis taxes, there is still shortages and a growing national debt.

Brave Men Press Releases First Books

I am copying and pasting the press release below.  But basically Brave Men Press is a new independent publisher that has released a lot of “coinsides” and is now releasing their first book: No Theater by Chris Tonelli.

***

BRAVE MEN PRESS is excited to announce the release of our first book, NO THEATER by Chris Tonelli.

Considering the responsibilities of the social world with a disconnected eye, NO THEATER is a collection of meticulously crafted poems that perform outside of time, but remain intuitively familiar and profound. Chris Tonelli reveals the artificialities of the everyday self with a language stalked by loss yet driven by possibility. Here, these poems come prepared in an armature of many masks and invested with an insight sure to move around the mental furniture of any reader.
Chris Tonelli co-curates The So and So Series and is the author of four chapbooks, most recently For People Who Like Gravity and Other People (Rope-A-Dope Press, forthcoming). He teaches at North Carolina State University in Raleigh, where he lives with his wife Allison.
Read a sample poem at http://sixthfinch.com/tonelli2.html

Anderbo Looking for Novelist

Anderbo, an online lit mag, has put out a call looking for a novelist.  They hope to produce their first full-length novel for the website. Anderbo recently was published in Dzanc’s Best of the Web for 2009 for the story “The Right of Passengers” by Waqar Ahmed.

***
ANDERBO SEEKS NOVELIST:
Anderbo.com is seeking to post ONE unpublished entire novel on its website by December 1, 2009 for at least the following six months. We will look at the FIRST 30 PAGES (up to 10,000 words) of your e-manuscript and decide within 60 days if we want to see more. THERE IS NO READING FEE and all literary rights will remain with the author. No novel submissions will be accepted after September 1st. We guarantee to choose and use one manuscript, and to pay an honorarium of $300 to the chosen author upon publication. For technical guidelines and address see http://www.anderbo.com/guidelines.html

Bitten

So, here we are, the middle of summer and let’s take a look at some entertainment news. Funny enough, all revolving around vampires.

Twilight’s sequel New Moon is set to be released in theaters in November.  As much as I really started abhorring the books, it will be worth a gander. Although it is in this book that everything starts getting maudlin and melodramatic, but hey, nothing is perfect.

True Blood is back for it’s 2nd season on HBO.  I seriously have no idea why on earth this show has developed such a big following, but whatever. It’s hokey, full of cheese and the acting . . . well, its pretty obvious that the actor’s are acting.

The Vampire Diaries has been picked up by the CW and will begin airing episodes this fall. Congrats to L.J. Smith, however, I won’t hold my breath.  This is a pretty decent YA series that my sister and I read and reread growing up and has recently been re-released in 2 2-book special editions. Things never translate well between the written word and movies.  Funny enough, series based on books don’t translate the best either.  Who knows how much the plotline will diverge from the actual books.  I hope not much, but, like I said, things never translate well from book form to other media forms.

Also, Koishite Akuma, just began airing in Japan. What does this have to do with with American entertainment? Well, nothing really, unless you are like me and actually like Asian drama.  But, it is amusing to me because it is yet ANOTHER vampire related thing that is out in the entertainment world.

Vampires and the entertainment industry are no strangers to one another, but I find it rather amusing that now we are being swamped with all things vampire right now. What has happened that we have a sudden resurgence in vampire entertainment? People like to say it is all thanks to the success of Twilight, but can one book (or 4-book series) really bring such a rejuvenation into this long decaying and usually hokey market (seriously, there really aren’t a lot of great vampire movies/series out there)?

Message in a Bottle

Now, I am a member of Gaia. A really nice social networking site with games, cool items, and all that fun stuff. Now, in their aquarium section of the site, they have teamed up with Verizon Wireless to do messages in bottles. So you write a message and send it out on the web among other Gaians. It is interesting. Depending on who gets the bottle you can have some cool comments, others are just downright sick or rude. Not that I really care about that.

This post is about asking about a favorite book. The majority of hits off that bottle were about people who said they never read. Really, quite tragic. My siblings don’t like to read either. It might not help that my 10 year-old stepsister had to learn English as a second language, but she doesn’t read and gets intimidated by somewhat bigger books, some that aren’t that big at all.

It is really disturbing to see the number of people who don’t read. Libraries, journals, publishing companies are closing, cutting back, and re-organizing. It is rather scary that in this world, the written word is taking a back seat to movies, video games, and other instant gratification activities. I am guilty of this sometimes, but I always try to find time to read, whether it is a scanlation of a manga that I like, or re-reading an old favorite (like Austen’s Mansfield Park), or finding a new book to read (like Dan Brown’s Angels & Demons – not new as in recently published, but new as in ones I have not yet read).

I have a huge list of books that I want to read. My best friend Sassy says that as long as there are books to read that you haven't read yet, you can't die until you've read them all. It's a fun sentiment. My friends and I are all bookworms, bookaholics, bookaphiles. We read. We devour books. So it is hard to imagine a generation of people that seem to be bookaphobics. There are many books that are well worth the time you spend reading them, some that you wonder how they ever got published, but still worth reading at least once, right?

How do we get the younger masses reading again? Maybe it would help if parents weren’t so busy today and could actually spend time reading to their children, like my grandmother used to read every night to my sister and I.

I am only 24 and already missing those good ol’ days.

Micro-fiction that makes no sense

Sometimes the girl wondered what the big deal was.  It was just another day like any other.  Sure, it was the day that began a new biological year, but what was it’s significance?  It was never really celebrated or rejoiced.  In fact, she was pretty certain that her mother cursed this day every year – if she wasn’t too drunk to remember that is.

The girl sighed.  Life, supposedly the greatest gift.  This morning she had received one card telling her she was now officially over the hill at 25.  Enclosed was a picture of a Mayfly, a creature that lived such a brief life.

Sometimes the girl wondered why she was born.  Her parents hated each other enough to get divorced and move half a world apart, leaving her behind, stuck in the middle.

The girl sighed again and looked down at the card on the table.  She was burning that picture tonight.

Where have I heard that before?

My little sister told me that she wants to be a famous writer.  Nothing wrong with dreaming, although we all know the likelihood of them hitting it big is relatively low, especially in this economy, digital age, and the instant gratification factor.

My favorite part about this is the fact that she hates reading.  Now, this could be because of her ESL nightmares, however, I think not. She is enraptured with her movies and television, but can’t be bothered to pick up a book.

Now, I am from the school that to be a good writer, you have to be a good reader.  Am I wrong?  I guess one doesn’t have to read a book to write a book, but it helps.  Especially if you can get your hands on those really special, well-written tomes.

I have always been an avid reader.  I have had stories and poems circulating and percolating in my brain for ages.  But I believe all the literature I have read, and the classes I have took, have made me the better writer.

It really breaks my heart to hear that the majority of children would rather watch tv than curl up with a good book.

Burn, Baby, Burn

And so this is how it begins. This is how it begins, and this is how it ends . . . in fire and in ice. Burning passions, freezing loves consuming the world – seeking, searching. It is never enough. It is never enough. This echoes and resounds. He is consumed by fire – nothing but burning passion. She is ice incarnate – her love burns as it freezes. Seeking, searching. They can never find the other without withering within. Opposites consumed by fire, burning hot, burning cold til nothing is left, even heaven has turned to ash.

Wolverine: Origins

Ah, Wolverine: Origins. As a huge fan of Wolverine and the X-Men universe, I was excited yet nervous to see how the Origins storyline would be handled. Since the other movies ventured away from the many alternate universes of the X-Men comics, I was worried that they would stray way too far away when they gave Hugh Jackman's character his own movie. They did stray, but not in a horrible 'I can't believe they did that way.'

Funny enough, they made Victor Creed and Logan brothers. Yes, Logan had a half-brother. Although the comic never came out and actually stated this, it was so obviously implied. No, his brother wasn't a mutant. Especially not Victor Creed. Aka: Sabertooth. Remember Sabertooth? The blond idiot from the first movie. To this movie's credit, they never mentioned that Victor was Sabertooth, but come on, anyone who knows X-Men history knows these two people are synonymous. I kow that Sabertooth's powers are much like Wolverine's but I didn't think that Creed was really older than even Logan. I could be wrong though.

Since they didn't connect Victor with Sabertooth, is that their way of trying not to conflict with the first movie? I mean, it was pretty hard to tell if there was a connection between Sabertooth and Wolverine. The only part really hinting at anything would be Sabertooth keeping the dogtags. That's about it. So did he or didn't he?

Yay! Silverfox was in the movie. Um. But in the X-Men realm I am familiar with, I don't remember the storyline all that well. I know that Wolverine thought that she was dead and I think that Sabertooth was supposed to have killed her, but the whole Weapon X stuff I am fuzzy on. It was kind of obvious that she was going to betray him or that something was going to happen because of the Wolverine story she told.

But the best part was Gambit! Heck yeah, we saw the swamp rat Remy Lebeau finally! Even with his imfamous stick that he uses to fight. They even put in some of the teasing/fighting relationship that he and Logan had. Tres cool.

So, overall, good movie. It's a whole bunch of events patched together, but when you're trying to explain the complicated 200 years or so of a character's life, it is bound to be difficult. And at least they have an explanation for the memory loss. Adimentium bullets to the brain - ouch. They explained it in Origins the comic, maybe, but I can't remember. I just remember the girl he loves dies (killed by him?) and after she dies, her diary where she chronicled Wolverine's history was burned, ergo, he will never know who he was before. Sad day. Oh well.

I didn’t see that coming

But still, it is rather amusing. The people at Unshelved posited a question to librarians, booksellers, and readers: “What do you wish publishers knew?” They went through over a hundred emails and compiled and distilled the responses into a book (with original comics based on some of the quotes). The title of this volume? Publisher Confidential: Frank Feedback for Publishers from Librarians, Booksellers, and Readers. Try saying that in one breath.

Who would have thought that there would be a book telling publishers what the public wants. Will the publishers listen? Who knows. My favorite part of this book is the cover illustration. A comic of a quandary. Librarians, booksellers, and readers are buying fewer books because of the sometimes astronomical pricing, according to publishers they are raising prices because no one is buying. Sound business sense. Since no one is buying, jack the prices to make sure it stays that way ;)

Still, this is a book worth checking out. Some of the quotes seem silly, but hey, it’s good for a laugh and a “hell yeah.”

Enjoy!

College Book Store to go Bookless

Caltech, needing to severely trim its 2010 budget, has decided to merge the Caltech Bookstore with the popular c-store.  They will sell merchandise and food, and some published Caltech authors, but other than that, not a book is to be seen.

Students will now have to acquire their textbooks online.  Right now, plans are being made to create an easy-to-use interface to make things easier on students and staff alike when it comes time to buy books.

Out of all the ways to cut spending – they choose to eliminate books.  Even TEXTBOOKS!  And this is a college?  True books seem overpriced and you can never get half of what you spend back off of those books, but some students need a bricks and mortar bookstore.

Check out the article and the responses this decision has made, here: [http://www.nacs.org/news/041709-caltech.asp?id=cm]

The Monkey’s Paw

A bookshop in Toronto, The Monkey’s Paw, is definitely a curiosity shop.  It specializes in “uncommon scholarly and out-of-print books; ephemera & images; manual typewriters; [and] biological specimens.”

Seriously. One would expect some odd things in a book and curiosity shop, but biological specimens?  Definitely a must-see if one is ever in the Toronto area.

The books offered are amusing to note, such as A Treatise on the Use of Flogging in Medicine and Venery by John Henry Meibomius along with poetry by Alfred Lord Tennyson.  Something for everyone. From history nerds, literature lovers, and people who are just amused by rare and weird items.

To check out some of what The Monkey’s Paw stocks, check out their blog. [http://mo-paw.blogspot.com/]

NewPages Reviews New Issues of Literary Magazines

NewPages updated their Literary Magazine Review column yesterday. It contains 11 new reviews of the current (or one of the most recent issues) of online and print magazines.

Magazines reviewed in this batch of reviews are:

The Antioch Review :: The Chaffin Journal :: ChiZine :: Eclectica :: The Farallon Review :: Journal of Ordinary Thought :: Manoa :: The Missouri Review :: storySouth :: The Sun :: Tuesday

This edition even contains a double review of the two most recent issues of Tuesday; an art project. So go and dip your toes into the world of literary magazines and maybe you’ll even be inspired to purchase the issues reviewed or even to subscribe to the magazines in question.

Shattered

Our lives are fragmenting, breaking like shattered glass.  Each time we think that we have picked up the pieces and mended it, it breaks again.  The pieces are getting smaller and smaller with each new fracture.

Pieces are missing now.  We can’t find them, perhaps they have turned to dust and been scattered to the wind.  The possibilities are endless as to where they have gone.  All that is known is that our lives shall never be whole, but rather mish-mashed mirrors full of holes, reflecting a refracted image.

That is our lives now. An imperfect image, splintered and divided. No glue, no heat can bind the gaping wounds and fill in the gaps. Nothing can replace what has gone missing, our most precious things.

How did they do that?

You know I attended catechism classes for my church for two years. All I can remember from those two years are the Apostle’s Creed, a little bit about baptism and confession (not that Lutherans practice confession like Catholics do), and some little pieces of scripture that had to be memorized.

But, the thing I remember the most (and probably one of the most worthless pieces of information) is how to figure out when Easter will fall.  Did you ever wonder how they determined when Easter will be every year?  There is actually a formula for it.

Ready? Ok, here goes.

Easter is the first Sunday after the first full moon after the Spring Equinox.  Hence why sometimes it is in March and other times it is in April.  It is all tied to the lunar cycle.  Very pagan in a way.  But what are Christian holidays but versions of pagan holidays?  Christmas shouldn’t technically be celebrated in December because if you do the math and everything Jesus was most likely born in either fall or spring (I can never remember which).  So why do we celebrate that particular holiday in December?  Well, it comes down to this lovely thing called evangelism.  When the Christians tried to convert the pagans, they made it easier by corresponding holidays and traditions all in one.

Hey it worked.  And if it didn’t?  Well, if you didn’t convert, then sometimes you died.  Gotta love it.

Anita Blake Telefilm Announced

Oh dear God no!  That was my first reaction to an article I read today on the Publishers Weekly website. http://www.publishersweekly.com/article/CA6648610.html

And why this reaction?  Once upon a time, I was a fan of the Anita Blake book.  Not so much now.  Why?  Well, truthfully when there is more sex in a book than plot, why bother reading?  The scariest part is that the author actually mentioned that she knew there was more sex and less plot.  Some fans craved the overly graphic and excessive sex scenes, while others wanted more plot.  What to do? Seriously, does that question even need to be asked? I think not.

Another reason for the reaction: HBO’s take on the Sookie Stackhouse series. Trueblood is campy, stupid, and filled with so much cheese that it is ridiculous.  Not to mention, its total disregard of the actual plot of the series.  Granted it is entertaining pop fiction, but still.  Charlaine Harris had some good books before the plot went totally south.  Open-ended series – never a really good idea.

So another book series bites the dust. Another movie shall be made. The first few books were ok, so maybe the movie will be ok.  But with the track record of movies and series based on books, that is hard to believe.

NewPages Book Reviews

It is the first of the month again - that means that NewPages has new book reviews up. From memoirs to short story collections to poetry to YA novels to essays on Emerson and writing, there is a little something here for everyone to dip their toes into and explore new books from several independent publishers.

Enjoy the reviews!
[http://www.newpages.com/bookreviews/2009_4/april2009_book_reviews.htm]

I Believe

I believe that the system is broken. I believe there is no “easy” fix that people seem to think will happen virtually overnight. It will take time. No one wants to take the time to make the changes. Why? Because we live in the here and now. Everything is instantaneous. Anticipation is gone, replaced by the demand of instant gratification. Why plants seeds and cultivate the ground? Why put in effort when results are demanded today?

I believe, in a lot of ways, we have become a lazy nation. For that, there is no drug, no Band-Aid, no alcohol that can magically make things right.

I believe it is wrong for banks and mortgage companies to lend money to those who obviously cannot afford to pay it back. I believe it is bad now, but it’s going to get worse. Much, much worse. It always does. Murphy’s Law, to some extent. Anything that can go wrong will. It just hasn’t yet.

I believe there is a problem – all for me and screw you. I believe there is hope. There is always hope. It exists in the most polluted and degenerative of places. I believe that hope is good. I believe that cynicism is necessary.

I believe that the so-called “American Dream” is a lie – it has been for a long, long time. This is not a land of opportunity, of milk and honey. We send aid to foreign countries (they need it, no doubt about that) while our citizens lose their homes and starve out on the streets.

What do you believe?

Read, Read, and Read Again

After reading a post on the RiverRun Bookstore blog entitled “A Big Muggle Hug For HP7,” I was struck by something. Here is a man who has a huge list of books to read so he believes rereading can actually be a waste of time. Amazing! Yes, there are many books out there that invite reading, but is it any reason to ignore the old friends on your shelves?

I have a rather large collection of books. It’s gotten to the point where my family has told me that I should not buy books if I don’t have room for them. Well, I don’t have room, but I still buy books. However, I have curbed my book buying to only the essentials, meaning the books I know I will read more than once. So, it makes me a little disenheartend to read that rereading is a waste of time.

The author says he has forgotten how good it’s been to reread a favorite. Well, isn’t that why it’s a favorite? A book that’s seen you through hard times, good times, that is battered and dog-eared, that still surprises you at times. Truthfully, the books on my list to read have ended up disappointing me more often than not, so I have been spending my time rereading. Mainly, I have been rereading Austen. Who doesn’t like her work? I finally managed to acquire all of her finished novels, so I decided to read (and reread) the books. They only get better upon further acquaintance.

So what to do? I say don’t neglect your favorites on the shelf, floor, box (any available surface really) in favor of new books. That is not to say to ignore new books, but try to spend some quality time with the oldies as well as the newbies, otherwise, why buy the books if you have no intention of reading them again?

Silence Golden for Writers?

A recent article stated that given the choice, most writers prefer silence while they write. A quote, I believe, was something like “My music is silence” or something like that.

Now, I understand that music can be distracting when trying to concentrate on certain things, but it is a must when I write. Hell, my first book was written while I played the soundtrack to Daredevil, over and over again. I don’t really think that affects my writing. I crave the added noise. I don’t know why, but I find silence can be more distracting than some other constant background noise. And certain music can help put me in the mood to write a particularly challenging scene.

Although, truthfully, I usually become absorbed in the writing so that I don’t even hear the music anymore. It’s just a noise in the background that I do not focus on. It is there, but generally tends not to pull my attention. Music was more distracting when I was trying to do my homework more so than when I try to write.

Really, I am sure, it comes down to the individual. Some people are more comfortable with silence, while silence just creeps other people out. I fall into the latter category.